The Latest on Mom...Hospice?!?!?

Mom turned 86 last month.

It has not been a good winter for her. In fact, the last few winters have been a struggle, each progressively more so.

A handful of years ago, a physical exam revealed that mom had very mild COPD. We were startled. I didn't think much of it at the time.

Mom never smoked. She never, as far as she knows, worked around asbestos. She never worked in an environment that affects people's lungs. When I was young, my dad smoked...two packs a WEEK, about six cigarettes a day, and not all of them around the house. Mom didn't hang with people who smoked. So, she didn't inhale a lot of second hand smoke.

We read recently that COPD can be a genetic thing. Who knows really.

Anyway, with each passing year, the COPD has become increasingly worse. And, apparently, as a result, mom has become increasingly susceptible to URIs. This winter, she's had one after another.

And, the COPD itself is now pretty well advanced.

Her breathing is now labored at best. Sometimes it's very difficult.

There are other ways her health is deteriorating.

She was actually swabbed for a COVID 19 test two days ago because she chronically has symptoms, because of other health issues, and she developed a fever in the range that suggests she may have contracted the disease...and at the home she's in 7 people have tested positive already.

Mom's vulnerable because, even though residents are in isolation, mom doesn't cooperate, partly because she is incredibly strong willed and, I suspect that her memory is so bad that she simply doesn't remember that she needs to stay in her room.

She's also had two incidents in which she's zoned out and become completely unresponsive and even foaming at the mouth. Epilepsy runs in her family, so these could be seizures.

So, yesterday, the nurse practitioner from the medical practice that cares for residents of the home called me while I was working. She wanted to review the latest with me.

Because I work with the public and was concerned about bringing infections to mom, and haven't been well myself, I haven't seen mom for about a month. I've been talking to her nurses.

I know mom's not well. But, as I was talking to the nurse practitioner, she began to talk about starting mom on morphine to ease her discomfort with breathing. And, it struck me: This is end of life talk!

Then she suggested taking mom off of every pill that's nonessential, and saying that mom's lack of interest in eating fits with everything else she's seeing.

Then, while my head was spinning she dropped the H word...HOSPICE. She's recommending that we consult them.

I guess I shouldn't have been blindsided.

I simply didn't realize it had gone so far.

So we called a family tele-meeting last night.

Our rule is that we will always agree about everything. Since dad began to get bad we've always been able, ultimately, to agree, and it's always worked.

Last night it was easy. We were all pretty much thinking the same thing.

We agreed to removing the nonessential pills and to consulting Hospice.

We'll call the home this morning to get that under way.

I have to admit that I'm still in shock over this.

I'm not convinced that Hospice will agree that mom's ready for their care...

...but, I also know that I'm pretty consistent about living in denial about stuff like this.

I'm off of work today simply because the vertigo takes over when life becomes to much. I'm weak and tired and emotionally and spiritually exhausted.

I've been much worse, but I'm not well. And, this could be a long haul.

Things are going on with Evie that are concerning. I work in a grocery store where germy people are all around me all of the time...

...and mom's deteriorating, and I can't visit her.

Still, we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him....