Tuesday, May 5, 2020

Mom's Body as Toxic Waste...and, More Tender Thoughts

We met with the funeral director last evening to discuss what happens as far as the things he's involved in are concerned.

Mom's arrangements were preplanned and so some of this was already settled, but much wasn't because of the governor's stay at home order and, beyond that, the fact that mom was COVID positive.

Not that we're planning to object, but we think we're being taken advantage of with the fees. Many of the services that were prepaid can't be performed. There can't be what they call around here, a viewing. And  there can't be a funeral, apart from the graveside service. And, embalming can't take place.

The funeral director figures that he'll have to refund a few hundred dollars because his services are reduced. Mom's plan, with many bells and whistles engineered by dad cost many thousands of dollars. This small refund can't possibly be right.

For us, in the midst of the crushing emotion, this will be a "turn the other cheek" moment. It's not worth the trouble.

But, if anyone ever asks, I won't recommend this funeral home to anyone.

---------------

Apart from that, the funeral director went into excruciating detail in explaining how he was required to handle mom's remains.

I'm guessing that this was the first COVID-19 positive body he'd personally had to deal with. The state regulations are very precise but the way he detailed what he'd gone through, it seemed to me as if this was the first time that he, personally, had to carry them out.

His explanation was under the guise of explaining why there could be no embalming or dressing of the body, but  really!

Mom's body will, for all time, be treated as highly toxic waste. Her remains can be placed in the cemetery, but only because many precautions are taken.

These are unusual times and, certainly, the ongoing immense threat of the spread of the Coronavirus is a legitimate concern.

But, none of us were permitted to be with mom as she was passing. Normally, the funeral process is one in which people who are grieving are given aid and comfort. That has not been the case here.

I can only imagine what the emotional aftermath will be.

---------------

It's a comfort to be confident that mom is with the Lord. She had an unbelievably difficult life into early adulthood. I know that from horrible and bizarre stories from aunts, uncles and cousins.

Mom deeply loved the Lord. My most distinct memories of her from my childhood are of the time she spent in the Word and in prayer. She was a loving and faithful witness to me in my wayward teen years.

As much as anyone I know, she produced genuine and sweet fruit in keeping with repentance.

It goes without saying, that there's an emptiness in my life that can never be filled.

No comments:

Post a Comment